Articles in Spanish without translation: (see:
DICIEMBRE 2002)
On my recent trip to B’nei Israel, one of our members asked me what I want from our community. I will tell you, but under one condition. What follows is my opinion as only one member. I will share my vision, but I ask that in the future, you will share yours.
I want us to be a Kehillah Kedosha, a Holy Community.
We all have many groups in our lives. We have our colleagues at work, our classmates at school, and our neighbors near home. We have circles of friends and teammates with whom we play sports. We might call these communities, but I would like a different sort of community, a community set apart. How do we create this?
In Hebrew a group is a kahal (קהל), and a community is a kehilah (קהילה). What is the difference between a group and a community, the letters yud and hey, which form the word יה, Yah, one of the many names for God. If we want our synagogue to be more than just a group, if we want it to be a real community we must invite יה to our classes, services, meetings, discussions, onegs, parties, meals, text studies, weddings, conversions, b’nei mitzvah, funerals, and births.
Some of us are uncomfortable with all of my God-talk. One B’nei Israel member recently had the courage to tell me she did not believe in God. I asked, “What God do you not believe in?” She described a commanding God, a father figure, one who judges and punishes, a God of power and dominion. I told her I generally do not believe in this God either. At least not very often. When I say that I want to invite יה into our synagogue, to convert our groups (קהל) into communities (קהילה), I am talking about a different sort of God.
The God I describe exists between people when we come together with a holy purpose. We can operate a very busy synagogue, holding many services, activities and classes, but we can do all of this without a central, unifying, holy purpose. Being busy does not make us holy. Some of the most unpleasant synagogues are the busiest, with the largest buildings and the largest memberships. Instead, I would like a community that comes together to create a holy purpose, a sacred vision. Then all that we do should be dedicated to this vision and purpose. From the smallest meeting to the largest service, all of our energy should point in the same direction.
The God I believe in most often is the God that inspires us to better our world. Our world can be bleak and depressing. We sometimes feel surrounded by dishonesty and violence. Yet we keep working to improve this world. The God I believe in lifts us when we fall. We all suffer tragedy and pain at some point, but something inspires us to keep going. Something helps us take one more step, when we would rather lie down. And the God I believe in enkindles within us a desire to learn and grow. Each of us come to Judaism with a different background and different desires. Yet we all share the desire to acquire knowledge and better understand our world. When I invite יה into our community, the God I invite inspires us to better the world, helps us heal our wounds, and enkindles within us a desire to grow.
The question was, What would you like from our community? I would like a kehillah filled with this type of יה. One in which all of our energies are directed at these three purposes. So that when we lead a service, or we fix a light bulb, when we teach a class or we plan a youth group pizza party, we are doing God’s work. To me, such a community would be a kehillah kedosha. But this is just my vision for our community. I look forward to hearing yours.
Michael Holzman
Dear friends:
For some reason I still fail to recognize, celebrating Chanukah is something very special: The festival of the lights and the commemoration of the miracle. It is a celebration we always expect with joy and which goes back 2400 years. And also for some reason, I keep repeating the same story.
Judea was governed by Antiochus, the Syrian king, who tried to assimilate the Jews to the Greek culture, demanding that they adore the Greek gods and forget their culture and religion. The Jews refused to do it, and under the leadership of the Maccabees, fought for three years until they drove out the Syrian oppressors. When they retrieved the Temple in Jerusalem, the Hebrews found statues of the Greek gods and other religious artifacts. So they cleaned it and rededicated it. When they found the Ner Tamid, they found oil enough for one night, however, the miracle occurred and the oil lasted eight days.
When I was a child, this was the festival I always awaited. The kindling of the candles, eating Katoffel Van Kugen mit Apffel Pure (today’s latkes), receiving “Gelt”, real and make-believe, all these made this celebration a very special occasion.
Today, I celebrate in different homes of friends. We kindle the lights, we chant the blessings, and the kids and youngsters wait for their Gelt, not necessarily hoping for chocolate gelt. The songs now occupy a secondary place for lack of time, because the young people want to go out with friends or because some not so young are tired of their daily lives.
I notice that time is becoming more costly with each day that passes. Maybe, we have less time, or worse, we are slaves to superfluous goals, which, as every other superficiality, remain unguarded for the rest of the world.
On the other hand, I observe a Community, small in number of families, but big in love and warmth. Where friends get together and share their sadness and joys, where grandparents are important and respected, where charity is always present.
Personally, I choose the second option and I hope my children, when their time comes, will choose wisely.
Maybe this is the reason for my always liking Chanukah, maybe that is why I always repeat the same story, maybe that’s why I always remember, maybe that’s what it’s all about: education with values.
Coincidentally, the Chanukah celebration is linked in B’nei Israel with the Board of Directors’ election. That is why I take this opportunity to thank all the people who have made it possible to culminate a year of work in a positive and harmonious way, for the benefit of the Community.
To mention each one would be inappropriate, however, to all of you who collaborated and helped so much, a heartfelt thank you in behalf of B’nei Israel, Your Community.
We have a lot to do in the near future, and I’m sure we can count on you.
Before I bid you farewell, I would like to inform you that we are closer each day to realizing our own small miracle: having a full-time Rabbi. We must not for a single second doubt or stray until we reach our goal, and of course, your help counts and we expect it.
On behalf of my family and myself, I wish you all a happy Chanukah.
Chag sameach,
Eduardo Keibel
Good news about the UJCL convention in Panamá, from Feb. 6 to 9, 2003 so that you can make your plans to come.
The cost of the convention will be $175.00 per person. This includes the welcome cocktail on Thursday night, lunch on Friday, Shabbat dinner, lunch on Saturday, the gala dinner on Saturday night, and lunch on Sunday. It also includes transportation from the airport to the hotel and to all convention activities. For all the people who pay their convention fee before Dec. 15, 2002 there will be a discount of 10%. Checks should be made out to Sylvia Robles or Julieta Maduro, with an indication that they are for the UJCL. All payments should be in United States dollars.
The fee for the UJCL Youth convention will be $100.00. The UJCL has set up a special fund to help defray the cost of lodging for the young people. Participants are asked to please pay part of the cost and the UJCL will make up the difference in the cost of lodging.
The convention will be held at the Marriott Hotel and there is a super special rate of $105.00 per room per night for this excellent hotel.
We will be sending you the convention and hotel registration forms soon.
MAIN SPEAKER: RABBI DANIEL GOLDMAN - Bet-El Community, Buenos Aires
SPEAKERS:
Simultaneous translations will be offered in all the conferences.
Regards,
Rita de Sasso
CONGREGACION KOL SHEARITH ISRAEL
Apartado 4120
Panamá 5, Panamá
TELÉFONO: (507) 225-4100
TELEFAX: (507) 225-6412
e mail: congksi@ayayai.com
e mail: rsasso@sinfo.net
It has been less than one year since Marvin and Michael sat down to dinner in Boston, U.S.A. and talked about the future.
Since that fateful meal, and the 3½ hours of conversation that encompassed it, that which started as the weaving of a dream, has come to its climax, and we hope, a realization of the dream.
Michael and Nicole came to visit with us last Passover, Michael has since made two trips here on his own. They have a baby now; Avi, three months old. Michael has met most, if not all, our members. Those who know him only slightly, like him and are supporting our plans to hire Michael as our first permanent Rabbi.
Those who know him better, or have hosted him in their homes, have come to appreciate him even more. His compassion, his dedication, his spirit of humbleness and Tikkun Olam, his openness, his kindness, his knowledge, has captivated us - and increased the desire for him and Nicole and Avi to come and live here and serve our community.
Fortunately, the feeling is mutual.
This won’t be easy for us. Much will be asked of every one of us. We are a relatively small community - and not rich, by any standards. A year ago, there was only one Rabbi in all Central America, Gustavo Kraselnik in El Salvador. Today there are three: El Salvador, Panamá, and Puerto Rico, with two about to be added in Curacao and tiny Aruba.
The only large community among them is Panama, with 150 members approximately. The others are our size - or smaller.
That they have done this, is a tribute to their visions and sacrifice. They are all happy with the decision.
It is a cost. Certainly. Moreover, it is an investment. A Rabbi of Michael’s quality and character and personality will help us grow and unite us. He will provide a level of spiritual leadership that we have never had.
We have held our own with our own for 15 years. Now it is time to move on. We must give credibility and continuity to B’nei Israel - or we go the way of the Dinosaurs and the Mayans.
December 9 is a night when every member should show up and be part of the General Assembly and elections. This next year will be crucial. We have a lot of work to do and we need a leadership that will provide the menu to make the dream a reality.
Join us! Your caring, your giving, is a passport to a better and fuller life for you and yours. It won’t make you rich, but you will feel enriched.
Its contract time for us and the Rabbi. We are very close. There is little that separate us. Do your part to ensure that Michael Holtzman is with us after his ordainment on May 14th in New York.
All together, we can do this. Let’s get it done.
by Marvin Sossin
November 29, 2002
Over 100 members and friends joined the community in a memorable Chanukah celebration on Friday, Shabbat, Nov 29,2002 at the B’nei Israel Synagogue, led by our Rabbi-to-be, Michael Holtzman.
I cannot recall ever being so profoundly moved by a Chanukah night. There was a table in the center of the synagogue, laden with Menorahs of all shapes and sizes. The lights went down, and the Chanukias were lit, and the temple glowed with the glittering lights. It was wonderful.
We sang the songs. We chanted the prayers. We held each other and remembered the thousands of Chanukah nights and lights that preceded this one.
There wasn´t an empty seat, and the wine didn’t go around - but there was no room for sadness. Only a warm co-mingling of bodies and spirits as we sung and swayed together.
Chanukah came early this year, but at the Zieglers home, high up on the hills of Heredia, the feeling was the same. Haimeshe.
The fireplace was burning. Thank goodness because it was a crisp and cloudy day. But inside the home, there was a feeling of camaraderie and community.
All of Jennie Rodríguez mixed couples group were there, together with many of the member families of B’nei Israel. Also, Michael Holtzman, our Rabbi-to- be, was there to join in the happy tradition.
Deborah Singer and David Sossin both played guitar and all joined in the beautiful Spanish Costa Rican and familiar Hebrew melodies. The feeling was mellow.
Many thanks to the Zieglers, who are looking forward to their children moving from Florida to live in Costa Rica.
May these Chanukah Parties at the Zieglers, Paul and Sonia, truly continue as a yearly tradition - until the walls bust out, by which time Paul and Sonia will have realized their dream of a large estate farm on land they own close by.
November 7, 2002
On October 19, my husband, David and I attended Ana Julia Podcaminsky’s Bat Mitzvah at B’nei Israel. What an inspiring experience! Ana Julia and her older sister, Maria are the daughters of Mario and Zulema Podcaminsky. This loving family came to us from Argentina a few years ago, and they’ve become a great asset to our community.
Anita Hohenberg de Kaufman
Like so many other children, Ana Julia has had to face many challenges. Thanks to her great perseverance, she has been able to overcome them to become a beautiful young woman, capable of anything she sets her mind to.
Her Bat Mitzvah was perfect. Perfect! There was not a moment of hesitation, not a flaw. She spoke every word clearly, in Spanish and in Hebrew. She read from the Torah. She sang. She directed the service. Such poise! This was a landmark performance for her, and one I’m sure she’ll remember for the rest of her life.
Hilda ten Brink worked with Ana for over a year, with great patience and love to prepare her for this day. The result was well worth the effort. There wasn’t a dry eye in the synagogue. I am filled with pride when I see our children involved in such wonderful undertakings. All the teachers of the Jennifer Sossin School for Jewish Education are to be commended. I believe that their fine work does not receive enough recognition.
So many children in this world never have the opportunity to strive for something better. Very often, they are not aware that there are so many things out there that they are capable of mastering if given half a chance. Most school systems are quick to recognize children’s shortcomings. Rarely do they give the out-of-the-ordinary child the opportunity to aim high, to have out-of-the-ordinary dreams.
The Jennifer Sossin School, under Jody Bonilla’s intelligent guidance and with the dedication of its teachers does indeed provide our children with these opportunities. The structure of our Bar/Bat Mitzvahs is very demanding of our young people. My mother used to say that Judaism is full of intelligent rules and regulations. These rituals call for our youngsters to take on responsibilities that most people don’t take on until they are well into adulthood. Most adults never have to do anything that comes close to this exercise. But our kids, the kids of B’nei Israel, all manage to perform at the highest level of excellence.
I believe that all our efforts on behalf of this community are extremely worthwhile. This gives us the strength to continue to work for B’nei Israel. Without B’nei Israel, our children would not receive these opportunities.
These days, when we are so concerned with attracting new members, all we need to do is invite more and more people to attend these events. Words become superfluous.
Last Saturday, November 16, our son Michael Tarcica became a Bar Mitzvah, and we had the joy of sharing with our family and friends this wonderful event.
We wish to thank Gonzalo Vega publicly for the excellent preparation he gave our son, and also for the great enthusiasm he put on the leading of the services that day, creating a warm and touching ambiance for all those present.
Johnny Tarcica and Family
November 30, 2002
This was not a child, fulfilling her obligations of Bat Mitzvah. This was a poised, mature young lady who took total command of the service and was faultless in her delivery of the Parashah and in directing the service.
Sarah, daughter of Dina Ackerman and her adopted father José Rosekrantz, displayed a presence that has rarely been seen from our Bimah.
Her speech, after the main part of the service was over, had never been reviewed by her parents. She insisted on that. So, when I saw tears gathering in Josés eyes, it was because of the emotional impact of what Sarita was saying, her words of praise and love for José. Sarita´s biological father died long ago in a traffic accident.
The Oneg that followed was for the record books. Dishes of treats for the Jewish connoisseurs. Herring and Nova and bagels and cheese and all the desserts we love.
Mazel Tov to Dina and José - and most of all - to Sarah.
Marvin Sossin
Our first Bat Mitzvah in B'nei Israel ocurred 15 years ago with Rachel ten Brink, beautiful and beloved first child of Hilda and Jerry. There started a tradition. It marked the first time a female ever mounted the Bimah. And Hilda contributed a ring to which we have added a ring every Bar/Bat Mitzvah. This beautiful chain now counts to 47 rings. The new one is always presented by the predecessor.
The tradition goes on.
Rachel, apart from being beautiful in face and form is working in New York. Her intended is Herman Goihman, from Venezuela. He is studying in New York.
Rachel arrived in Costa Rica in time for our Chanukah service on Friday, Nov. 29. We were also honored by the presence of Dr. Mauricio and Miriam Goihman, parents of Herman.
The announcement was made on Saturday night at Hilda’s home in front of her closest friends and family. No date has been announced for the marriage.
How wonderful it would be if Rachel and Herman took their vows in B’nei Israel where Rachel grew up, and whose soul still counts the synagogue as her designated home.
By David A. Harris * - Forward, November 22, 2002
Sometimes I fantasize that I’m a hotel switch-board operator, making wake-up calls to all those Jews who remain fast asleep, or in a daze, or buried under the blankets. I keep phoning; they keep ignoring the call. Eventually they pick up the receiver, if only to stop the irritating ring. But do I get them to stay on the line, when I try to get their attention and convince them to come out of their airtight bubble and see the situation we are facing?
The 1990s was so comforting that it lulled many American Jews into a deep sleep. Our situation is quite different today, but many are still sleeping.
During the 1990s, the collapse of the Soviet Union extended the frontiers of democracy in Central and Eastern Europe, Latin America, Asia, and Africa. It deprived Egypt and Syria of the chance to continue playing off one superpower against another, denied home and haven to Middle Eastern terrorist groups, and brought new life to Jewish communities that had been repressed under communist rule.
Israel witnessed extraordinary developments. The Madrid Conference in 1991, the Oslo accords two years later, and the treaty between Israel and Jordan the next year seemed to promise an end to the Arab conflict with Israel. A series of annual Middle East and North African economic summits brought Arab, Israeli, and other business leaders together to help make peace a reality through enlightened mutual self-interest. Several Arab countries established diplomatic links with Israel, while others met with Israeli representatives just below the radar. India, China, Japan, South Korea, the newly democratic countries of Central and Eastern Europe, and countless other nations were rapidly upgrading their relations with Israel.
American Jews were also doing nicely. Anti-Semitism, it appeared, had been largely relegated to remote stretches of Idaho and Montana. American Jewish political, economic, social, and cultural influence reached new heights, as indicated by the many Jews appointed to high office in the Clinton administration - including two Supreme Court justices - and the nomination of Joseph Lieberman as the democratic vice-presidential candidate in 2000.
The decade witnessed considerable attention paid to the Holocaust and its legacy. The U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington became a must-see. Holocaust curricula were adopted in a number of countries and in several American states. And, more or less willingly, numerous countries and institutions began to examine their acts of omission and commission during the Holocaust, and to offer restitution to the victims.
In sum, we came as close as we ever have been to the long-sought goal of the normalization of the Jewish people.
Then we got mugged in 2000.
Despite a left-center government eager to achieve a historic peace with the Palestinians, Israel found itself the target of a calculated campaign of Palestinian-instigated terrorism.
Seeking to defend itself, as any government would under similar circumstances, Israel learned once again that the rules of international relations apply differently to the Jewish state.
It received little credit for its far-reaching peace initiative, but much condemnation for its efforts to stem the violence. The media, with a few notable exceptions, came down hard on Israel, almost with a vengeance, giving rise to the impression that it had been lying in wait for just such a moment.
We must wake up and recognize that not only is Israel in danger, but that the worldwide campaign to isolate, condemn, and weaken Israel has a large anti-Semitic component.
The breadth and depth of anti-Semitism in the Arab and Islamic world includes the revival of the notorious blood libel charge, the airing on Egyptian television of a 41-part serialization based on the infamous “Protocols of the Elders of Zion” during Ramadan this year, and the teaching of hatred of Jews - all Jews - in the Saudi-funded madrass schools from the Persian Gulf to Pakistan.
In Western Europe there have been hundreds of documented anti-Semitic incidents since the fall of 2000. In response, the United Nations, human-rights organizations, and the European governments - with the exception of a few outspoken voices of conscience - have hemmed and hawed.
Then things moved closer to home.
Near-riots against Jewish students from San Francisco to Montreal, requiring police intervention; the imam of New York’s leading mosque - seen by some Jews as a dialogue partner - who suddenly disappears and resurfaces in Cairo to repeat the vilest anti-Semitic canards; the New Jersey poet laureate who asserts that Israel was linked to the September 11 terrorist attacks; two killed at the El Al counter at Los Angeles International Airport July 4; government warnings to synagogues, Jewish schools and organizations of possible terrorist attacks; arrests of terrorist cells from Charlotte to Buffalo to Portland, and the closure of terrorist-linked Muslim institutions from Virginia to Illinois to Texas that propagated hatred of the United States, Israel, and Jews.
Many Jews are alert to these dangers, but others - and I see them every day - still don’t get it, or perhaps don’t want to get it.
All the same, I remain stubbornly optimistic. For one thing, we have friends standing with us, and no better friends, thankfully, than the American government and people. Second, the panoply of American Jewish organization will do whatever is required to ensure the necessary responses to the challenges before us. And finally, I am optimistic because the Jewish people, throughout our history, have succeeded against all the odds.
In that same spirit of optimism, I continue to hope that those who haven’t yet answered the wake-up call will do so. We could use their help. Isn’t it time to come out of the bubble?
* David A. Harris is executive director of the American Jewish Committee.
CHANUKAH - 25 Kislev - 2 Tevet, 5763
Shalom v'Chag Sameach MeHa'Hillel Ha'Rishon b'Artzot ha'Brit
Hello and Happy Chanukah from the First House of Hillel in the U.S.A
We are now in the midst of Chanukah. Chanukah is a special holiday not only because of the joy it brings, but also because it is a holiday surrounded in mystery. For example, in reality there are two Chanukah stories. The first tale is about the national fight for liberation and the ideals of religious freedom. In this tale we celebrate the Maccabees and the fact that Jews were the first people in the world to fight for freedom of religion.
The "second" Chanukah story deals with the miracles of the candles and the fact that the oil in the newly dedicated Temple lasted for 8 days instead of one. No one quite knows how these two stories merged. Most likely sometime in the early middle ages the two tales became one and the modern form of Chanukah was born.
In the US, many non-Jews have added a third dimension to Chanukah. Because of the holiday's proximity to Christmas, many non-Jews simply assume that Chanukah is the Jewish Christmas. Yet the two holidays could not be less similar. Christmas is a major religious date on the Christian calendar in which they celebrate the birth of their savior. Chanukah is a minor holiday which has non of the importance of Rosh Ha'Shanah, or Yom Kippur. Without Christmas there is no Christianity, while Judaism would have survived even without Chanukah. Perhaps the fact that so many people confuse these two winter holidays is symbolic of how little they understand neither Christmas nor Chanukah.
While Chanukah and Christmas have nothing in common, Chanukah's multiple messages, however, do seem to be appropriate for a multi-cultural nation such as ours. Chanukah is about cultural respect, about being proud of whom you are without tearing down the other person. Chanukah teaches us dedication to ideals, and the realization that when we deprive another human being of his/her humanity in the end we also diminish ourselves.
Chanukah's message then is perhaps best summed up by its most famous song "Maoz Tzur" (Rock of Ages), whose first verse ends with the words:
"Yours the message cheering,
that the time is nearing,
which will see
all men free
tyrants disappearing."
Rabbi Peter E. Tarlow
Once, when Joshua was at Jericho, he looked up
and there was a man standing opposite him
with a drawn sword in his hand.
Joshua went to him and said to him:
Are you for us or for our enemies?
He said, No.
I am the captain of God’s army.
Now I have come!
Joshua fell face down to the ground
and bowed and said:
What does my Lord command his servant?
The captain of God’s army said to Joshua:
Take your shoes from your feet
for the ground where you stand is holy.
And Joshua did so.
Joshua 5:13-15
God of hosts, as our nation embarks on war,
we pause to remember that You do not choose sides.
You are neither for us nor for our enemies.
You are on the side of holiness.
May we continue to strive for holiness
even in anger, even in fear.
You are called baal milchamot, master of wars,
but You are also called adon hashalom, master of peace;
Make us know that You watch every battlefield.
May You guard the innocents who are always victims of war.
May You lend a just ear to those who pray to You for safety.
May You bring us from war to peace quickly
so that we may honor the sacredness of life,
as You have taught us.
If we dared to take the shoes from our feet
and feel the ground beneath us
we would know that the earth has no borders.
We would know that Your army
is not an army of force
but an army of justice and peace.
Help us bring a time when everyone on earth
will sit under a vine or a fig tree
with none to make them afraid.
Jill Hammer
Taken from Jewish as a Second Language, by Molly Katz
Once, nobody married Jews except other Jews (and rich, neurotic non-Jews trying to torture their Patrician families after all other methods, such as working in a live-sex show, had failed).
But there are many of you out there now, non-Jews swimming in the rubber cement of our mores, and you need help. There is much to learn about things you thought you already knew how to do, such as talk, think, eat, feel, and behave. Keeping a low profile, in the hope that your new lifestyle will evolve smoothly if you’re observant and tactful, is about as effective as walking into a panther cage with a shoelace for a whip.
This book is your guide to the mysterious web of your new environment. Study it carefully, and the secrets of our language will unfold.
Before you were Jewish, you probably spent time each day on your entertainment - jogging, painting, reading. You are fortunate to have this routine established, because it won’t be hard to fit in your new entertainment - worrying. Of course, you’ll have to forgo the jogging, but which is more important?
Natural-born Jews leave the womb equipped with a worry reservoir that is filled early and replenished constantly. We worry about everything. Worrying is as essential to our well-being as a balanced breakfast. It is our duty, our birthright, and our most profound satisfaction. There are no exceptions to this rule. All Jews worry all the time. If there is nothing handy to worry about, we are breath-stoppingly creative at finding something.
You will need daily practice to build your worrying skills. Think of this as weight training.
You may choose from three basic methodologies:
Engaging in everyday conversation with a natural-born Jewish person will provide lots of new material. If that isn’t feasible, simply make an enormous big deal out of some existing minor problem, such as:
When you have vacation time coming up, don’t start getting excited about Aspen or Europe. Jews vacation primarily on tropical islands. You re not permitted to enjoy these trips; you will be too busy complaining.
Follow these time-honored rules:
In summer, when the tropics are much too hot for Jews, we occasionally spend a week or weekend at a local resort area. At these times, our activities consist of eating, sitting, eating and shopping, followed by some more eating.
Things Jews don’t do at resorts:
To be appropriate for a Jewish person to engage in, a sport must be noisy, competitive, and expensive. Under no circumstance should a sport:
Favorite Jewish sports include:
Pastimes you always thought were relaxing will now be the opposite. Where you once sat back and let yourself be entertained, you must now contribute.
You will have to discard your pre-Jewish habit of passive viewing or your new family will assume you are depressed or sick. The TV screen is meant to provide discussion material.
Hollywood celebrities are prime topic. You will be expected to join the fun as everyone:
A popular thing to watch is car commercials. You must learn to be really enthusiastic about these. Get up and join your relatives as they move close to the screen to examine the new models. Contribute to the ensuing critique by describing your friends’ experiences with their cars. Relate frightening stories about how unsafe the manufacturing process is. Passionately argue about which model everyone is going to buy next.
Your new Jewish family expects you to be as well-read as they are, so keep up with the new books the same way they do.
Reserve a hot best-seller at the library. Complain about how long it takes to get it. Complain about how little time they give you to read it. Complain about the overdue fine. Hate the book.
You must shed any Pollyanna illusions remaining from your pre-Jewish years about the purpose of entertaining. A Jewish person would never invite people over for ridiculous reasons like having fun or treating friends.
Appropriate reasons include:
Far from being fun. Entertaining is a power play. As host, you are President-for-a-Day. This leaves guests in the position of having to please you, flatter you, compete for your attention, and pretend to be closer to you than anyone else there.
So you can’t blame them for reacting by engaging in some power games of their own, with you and with one another.
You’re all sitting around th family room. Estelle, a guest, asks several people, one by one, whether they’re cold. They all say no. “The air conditioner isn’t blowing on you?” she asks. They shake their heads. Estelle nods, relieved that everybody is comfortable, but still looks troubled. She waits patiently.
Finally someone says, “Are you cold, Estelle? Maybe we should turn the air donditioner off.”
“That’s a good idea,” Estelle says.
Variation A: Everybody is happily snarfing down your wonderful lunch when someone says, “Look - poor Flo spilled soup on her silk blouse.”
Flo must now either admit she’s wearing polyester or undergo the seltzer-and-angst ritual of removing a spot from silk. If she tries to hedge, someone else will do the follow-up: “Do you think it’ll come out, Flo?”
Variation B: You’re asked, “Do you have a little Hellman’s for this sandwich?”
The speaker wants to contrast her fine taste with your minginess when you bring out your Ann Page mayo. Don’t get excited if you happen to have Hellman’s. She’ll get you on something else.
A guest slips on a drop of water on the kitchen floor. She catches herself, but her gasp can be heard in Peru. After the Oh-my-God chorus, the Are-you-all-right refrain, and the No-wonder-she-slipped-this-floor’s-sopping-wet reprise, the incident is forgotten.
But only for ten minutes.
Each new arrival will be warned about the dangerous floor. He or she will question the victim. Similar experiences will be related, escalating in severity.
When it’s time to leave, each guest will remind you to be sure to do something about that death-trap floor.
Jews give gifts for every occasion. Occasions are not only birthdays and weddings, but also college acceptances, weight loss and the like. Sometimes we ask other’s opinions on whether to bring a gift, but we always do, no matter what the advice was.
Some pointers on giving and receiving:
| Type of gift | Suitable | Unsuitable |
|---|---|---|
| Candy | Large, rich chocolate chunks lumpy with nuts, or hand-dipped berries | Gumdrop fruit slices |
| Flowers | Roses | Arrangement stuck in Styrofoam in a cute pottery animal |
| Wine | Any good French, or a California that was just written up | Cold Duck, Asti Spumante |
| Food | A nice cheese, exotic fruit, jams with the labels all in Flemish | Petits fours in a decorator tin |
| Wedding gift | Any useless sterling or crystal item | Bradbox, punch bowl, pop-up toaster |
| Baby gift | A pink dress or blue suit that has to be dry-cleaned | A battery-operated animal that clacks around the floor and bangs into walls |
|
their condolences to our friend Eti Mines and her family, on the death of her mother in Israel, ALIZA MINES- November 2002 |
|---|
WE FEEL EXTREMELY PROUD of our Jody Bonilla for her wonderful work in the co-direction, with Eugenia Chaverri, of the play “Inventarios”. Congratulations also for the lighting of “Fiddler on the Roof”.
CONGRATULATIONS to Jason Marín, son of Ellen and Guillermo Marín, for winning the first prize in a Knowledge Bowl held at El Salvador. Jason represented Country Day School and, as always, he did a magnificent job!
DATES TO REMEMBER:
